Does anyone else hate those built-in zippers that are inside so many food packages these days? You know, you cut along a dotted line above the zipper. After you remove a portion of the product, you should be able to zip the bag closed to preserve what's left, right? The Tupperware that's never the right size or shape stays stored away but you've got a sealed-tight container to keep your goodies fresh. That's the principal of course. Have you ever gotten one to work? Is it just me?

There's a large bag of dog biscuits sitting in my pantry. Very large, and it's still got too many biscuits in it to fit in any of my Tupperware. So it's sitting in there, gaping, and probably letting weevils come in and out so they can get in everything nearby (because I always seem to bring home dog biscuits that look perfect in the store but start crawling within twenty-four hours of being stored near my cereal and pasta.)

This evening I opened a brand new five-pound bag of rice. It's got the zipper in its side, about two inches from the top seam of the bag. The only way to zip it is to lay it on the counter, flatten it around the zipper, being very careful not to let a single grain of rice or even a tiny speck of rice dust get in the zip area, and run a finger along the outside of the bag. Can you do that? I fooled with that blasted thing until I had to stop so the feds wouldn't think I'd destroyed my fingerprints on purpose. It is now duct-taped closed. Tomorrow I'll get in the storage area beneath the lanai steps and see if I can find Tupperware that is properly configured to hold five pounds of rice without taking up half of the space in my pantry.

You know, if they can put a man on the moon ...

Labels: just stuff